Nero's singing lesson

My friend Jesse gives Nero a singing lesson, or maybe it's the other way around.

Behold . . .

Even Nero can't help being stricken by the splendor and genius of my new 3G iPhone. Like the rest of us, he could hardly keep his paws off it.

Following several aborted attempts to purchase the world's most-wanted gadget, I put together a simple strategy. I arrived at the Apple Store in Fashion Valley Mall around 8:15 a.m. Friday, early enough to wait out the crowd for at least a couple of hours before having to be at work.

My heart soared as I approached a line of only six people stretching from the store's locked front doors. I took my position, and within 15 minutes at least 15 more people were lined up behind me.

I was inside by 9:30 a.m. and walking out as the newest member of The Cult half an hour later.

I did have a bit of a scare yesterday. Out of the blue the phone started displaying a startling "No SIM" error message in the upper left corner of the screen where normally the AT&T network-strength bars appear. Nothing on the phone would work. I tried turning it on and off several times and the problem persisted.

Then Rex took over. After he turned off and on a few settings like WiFi and airplane mode, the error message disappeared and the phone returned to normal mode. Our buddy Stan, who works as an Apple Store lead genius, said the card probably got jiggled out of place and that it probably wasn't anything to worry about.

Several forum posters at MacRumors.com reported the same problem. Some got their phones working again by doing a hard reset, while another was given a replacement SIM card when he took his malfunctioning unit to an AT&T store.

Hopefully, the problem won't surface again for me so that Nero's worship of the glorious device can continue uninterrupted.

Walkin' the dog

The pug and I hit Balboa Park for an early evening walk this week.


While other pups ran their heads off at the dog park, Nero took a more relaxed approach.
If you've ever flown into San Diego then you know that planes buzz Balboa Park as they approach the city's downtown airport.

For the pussy that has everything

This is the Kitty Wig.

It comes in four styles: Pink Passion (above), Bashful Blond (left), Silver Fox and Electric Blue.

Kitty Wigs are the creation of Julie Jackson, whose main day job is running a business called Subversive Cross Stitch. Jackson's cross stitch patterns include these warm and fuzzy catch phrases: "Shut your whore mouth," "Go F*** Yourself," and the seasonal favorite "Happy f****** holidays."

Each wig sells for $50 and arrives draped over a foam ball and stored inside a metal case.

The Web site suggests using the toy mouse rattle included with every wig to "help direct kitty's stunned gaze" during the inevitable wig photo shoot.

A shot of bourbon in a bowl of milk might also help.

It wasn't long before I started wondering why cats should be the only ones having all the fun.

Think there's a market for Pug Rugs?

We're having weather

It's raining - for real. Not that misty stuff that's just a step above fog. Or the brief drizzle that lasts only a few minutes.

We're talking old-fashioned, day-long, Louisiana-style stuff. And I'm loving it.

I have the day off, and I can't wait to get outside.

The showers started early this morning, and it's looking as though they will continue through the end of the day. We're even under a flood watch.

The storm was triggered by a slow-moving low front that is sucking up moist ocean air from the south.

I think it's only the second significant rain event that we've had in San Diego since I moved here more than a year and a half ago, so I'm determined to make the most of it.
Nero, however, is having none of it. I tried to coax him out for a potty break and he froze after walking just a few feet out the front door. He wouldn't budge. I think all of the California sunshine has spoiled him.

Of course, the big downside to all of this is the traffic. People in these parts don't know how to drive in this weather - much like the problem Southerners have when it snows. And to make matters worse, all of the oil that accumulates on the roads during our lengthy dry spells turns the highways into auto slip-n-slides.

That's why accidents always spike when the weather gets stormy. The CHiP already is reporting more than 20 accidents in the area on its amazing traffic Web site.

Another problem is landslides, particularly in the areas that burned in October and have lost protective vegetation.

But that won't keep me from throwing on my rarely worn raincoat and heading out into the beautiful wetness.

OB

We headed to Ocean Beach for a walk to the dog park where we watched a silvery fall sunset.

That's me and Nero above. Click on any photo to view it at full size.

Another Saturday . . . another dog park

Here are the results of my first trip with Nero to Nate's Point near the Cabrillo Bridge on the west side of Balboa Park.



The final scene showing the jet flying over downtown San Diego was shot from Cabrillo Bridge, which crosses Route 163 and leads to the park's large cluster of museums.

Back in sunny SoCal

After spending two frigid and wet weeks in New York and London, we're back home in San Diego where an early spring has arrived thanks to strong Santa Ana winds. The humidity today was only 13 percent and afternoon temps hit the low 80s (F).

No complaints were heard from my pug Nero.

Blue (eyed) Dog

My pug Nero likes taking rides in the back of my car.

California dreamin'

Southern California life seems to agree with Nero. He's taking full advantage of the sunshine and comfortable temps. And he's bonded with Piper, a slightly off-center yet lovable mutt that lives in the house where we are temporarily squatting.

Apartment hunting is proving a challenge, as I had been warned it would be. Most apartment owners ban dogs, but often allow cats. Clearly, felines saturating everything in smelly piss and shredding anything within reach is far more desirable to landlords than sweet puppies who spend their days playing with their toys and cuddling with their overly attentive owners.

So much for West Coast tolerance. Meow!

Back to step One

UPDATE ON THE PUG SITUATION:

For those of you concerned about Nero's fate following the food experiment (see Dec. 31 post below), you'll be glad to know that the little black pug is back to normal - both in terms of size, as is evident in the days-old pic above, and mentality.

Unfortunately, Rex's grand plan didn't seem to have any effect on Nero's compulsive eating habits. Within two days, he was back sucking down his meals in seconds and licking the floor like there's no tomorrow (or no food tomorrow).

Rex's theory was simple. Let the pug eat as much as possible. At some point he'll quit, and the gorging will serve as a lasting reminder that gluttony only leads to discomfort and queasiness.

It only worked for one day.

So what lessons did we learn from all of this? I'm going to have to watch Nero's diet and eating habits for the rest of his life. Rex will never doubt even my most outrageous claims about the pug's compulsive behaviors. And Nero ... he didn't learn a damn thing!

One down, eleven to go (Pug 12 Step)

"I don't believe it," Rex said on his first morning of his extended visit to New Orleans.

We had just watched the little black pug vacuum down his 1/3 cup of dry dog food for breakfast.

Nero doesn't eat like other dogs.

He attacks every meal as though he hasn't had one in weeks and doesn't expect to get another anytime soon. He buries his entire face in the bottom of his bowl. It's a fully physical effort that apparently requires heavy breathing, guttural grunting and full use of his compact muscles.

I had warned Rex about Nero before the trip. I had told him about the constant begging when anything is being prepared in the kitchen. About the incessant floor licking, an eternal search for the tiniest morsel of nutrition that might have dropped from a plate. And about the rummaging through garbage of any kind.

But like Thomas in the Upper Room, Rex had trouble believing.

He concocted an experiment that, on the surface, seemed simple and harmless. We would keep giving Nero food until he stopped eating, at which point his "addiction" would be proven to have a limit. In the process, the experience might actually cure Nero of some of his obsession.

I told him it wouldn't work. Nero would just eat until the point of sickness, or organ failure.

Which brings us to Friday night. Rex decided it was time for the experiment. He filled a medium sized mixing bowl with dog food and put it beside Nero's feeding tray. The pug went wild.

We watched. Nero ate. We watched some more. Nero kept eating. Sometimes he would pull his head out of the bowl to chew. At one point he moved about a foot and a half away from the bowl, sat down and stared at the food in apparent confusion.

An amazing 15 minutes after the experiment began, Nero had finally had his fill, consuming 10 times his normal meal quantity. His chest and upper stomach were bloated. His eyes were slightly glassy. His movements were deliberate.

"It worked!" Rex exclaimed in triumph.

I still wasn't sure we had accomplished anything other than adding a couple of inches to Nero's waistline.

We all went to bed wondering what would happen next.

Nero's sleep was restless. I woke several times to find him pacing the floor for a minute or two then returning to his bed. His breathing also seemed accelerated but, otherwise, he showed no signs of stress.

We woke in the morning to discover that Rex's experiment wasn't over. There was one more thing to do, he explained. We had to give Nero his normal bowl of food to see if the spell really had been broken.

I protested. Only hours earlier, Nero had eaten enough for the next week. Couldn't this end? Apparently not.

Rex scooped a regular serving of food into the pug's bowl and Nero raced for the meal. Then something amazing happened. Instead of shoving his face into the pellets, Nero pulled his head back and stepped away from the bowl.

He seemed as surprised as we were. The standoff lasted about half a minute. Then Nero slowly approached the bowl again and took a bite. He chewed slowly for a moment, then took another bite. Two minutes later the bowl was empty.

Was his momentary pause a sign of some mental reprogramming? Has his obsession abated, even a small amount?

I'm not sure at this point. But Nero does seem more sedate today. And he hasn't licked the floor once.